#ThanksMichelleObama

Hey, a blog that isn't me bitching about my day. Neat.

So I just came across this article that details how teens all across the country are taking to Twitter with the hashtag "#ThanksMichelleObama" to voice their displeasure over the USDA's new guidelines for school lunches. Normally, I skip right over these things, but multiple college classes require me to keep up-to-date on the news, so here I am.

I came into this article on the side of the teens: in the end, we decide what we put into our bodies. Requirements aren't gonna do jack because, frankly, I'm going to eat what I want to eat and this stuff looks absolutely disgusting. Check out this tweet by student Hunter Whitney if you need proof.

Look, I'm all for promoting healthy eating. I think that everyone should have access to both healthy, filling meals and knowledge about what they are eating and how it will affect their bodies. Unfortunately, many Americans are lacking in one or another of those areas--especially the education part. But that isn't my fault, so...yeah.

Forcing people to eat what, to me, looks like something left in a toilet bowl, is ridiculous. I know that there are plenty of delicious healthy dishes, but those aren't always cheap or easy to make.

You know what is cheap and easy? Going outside and doing stuff.

This article reminded me of growing up with my sister. Our dad would often take us out to his friend's farm which doubled as a small junkyard. It wasn't the place that I would particularly enjoy living, but for visits it was a great thing. They had this awesome half-overgrown jungle gym (actually a set of fuel tanks), a shady where we battled vicious animals (actually one large tree with a tire swing and a bunch of hornets), a maze of metal (actually...yeah, a maze of piles of metal), and, if you went waaay far behind their property (half a mile), a secret forest with a nice clearing and a small creek with all manners of aquatic creatures to be caught and inspected.

I have many memories of this place. I remember finding an old baseball in the metal maze and imaging myself as the newest incarnation of Indiana Jones. I remember chasing water striders for hours in the creek and marveling at the nature around me. I remember my dad's longtime friend being cremated on the edge of the property. As I wrote this I remembered climbing on stacks of hay bales two and three stories tall with kids whose names and faces I couldn't begin to recall.

I have so many memories of that place. I have very few memories of sitting inside as a child, playing video games and watching television. And, if I were asked to give me top five memories, I can guarantee that none of them will involve me sitting on the couch with a bag of chips staring mindlessly at a television screen.

That is what I think is wrong with youth today, more so than an unhealthy diet: an unhealthy lifestyle. Between going and cutting their hands on rocks while climbing or staying inside with the new Call of Duty, I'm afraid to postulate that a majority of young people will choose the latter.

About two weeks ago, some of my roommates and I decided to go on a picnic to the Granite Dells across the street from our campus. The Dells normally aren't my cup of tea: there are big rocks and more rocks and some bushes and rocks and that's about it. Me? I'm used to trees many times taller than a person and bushes so thick you can't hope to see anything hiding in them. But I digress.

I decided to break off from the group (who was eating lunch on a flat bit of rock on the lakeside) to explore a bit. So I went up and down and up and down and skirted around some ledges and almost fell backwards off a small cliff and grabbed some sharp objects accidentally and got myself stuck a few times and it was awesome. I came back to the group sweaty, tired, sore, and in a few spots, bleeding.

And I felt fantastic.

Getting outside is the hard part. Once you're there, it is easy to feel far more alive than any game or movie can hope to do. Let the politicians like Michelle Obama worry themselves on making kids eat mush. Me? I'm gonna go cut my hands.

-Garrett

Dear Diary

Today my friends dropped me off on the side of the highway. I ran back to school. It was awful for everyone involved.

Love,
Garrett

The Annual Billy Mays Post

So a few years ago, I started a little tradition.

Every year, Silverton High School -- go Foxes -- hosts a cross-country race affectionately dubbed "The Monster," so named because of a half-mile hill in the middle of the race that pretty much destroys all but the best runners.

I only have fond memories, of course. Most of sweating, groaning, and questions like "Why am I a runner?" and "Am I alive or dead or caught in some hellish in-between?"

Anyway, a few years ago I made a Facebook post advertising the race in hopes that people would, y'know, actually show up to a cross-country event. I know it isn't exactly a spectator sport (especially up in the woods), but it's the thought that counts, right? Regardless, I couldn't have this be just any advertisement. I had to put a little somethin' into it.

So I put the entire post in caps and acted like Billy Mays.

I like to pretend he's smiling down upon me when I'm feeling down.

I definitely got more replies than I would've had I just made a semi-begging post, so I decided to do it the next year. And the next. And I plan to continue for quite a while after.

I just finished writing this year's post, and it is by far the most ridiculous/least "educational" of all of my posts. Enjoy the eye-searing caps:

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HI, BILLY MAYS HERE! I'M BACK FROM THE DEAD TO REMIND YOU OF THAT SPECIAL TIME OF YEAR.

YEAH, I'M LATE ON THIS ONE. SUE ME.

GUESS WHAT TODAY IS? YOU BET YOUR GIBLETS IT'S THE MONSTER, YOU GOOF. THE MOST INTENSE RUNNING ACTION YOU GET THIS SIDE OF STEENS MOUNTAIN, WHICH IS ACTUALLY PROBABLY JUST AS INTENSE BUT FOR THE NEXT FEW MINUTES GO AHEAD AND PRETEND OTHERWISE.

WHAT? YOU SAY I SAID THE MONSTER WAS TODAY WHEN I IN FACT POSTED THIS THE NIGHT BEFORE? WELL THAT'S BECAUSE I FIGURED MOST PEOPLE WOULD ALREADY BE ASLEEP AND I'M CONSIDERATE AND STUFF.

THAT HALF-MILE HILL OF FALLEN LOGS AND SWEATY TEENAGERS IS STILL THERE, CHUMP, AND IT'S WAITING TO SWALLOW YOUR SOUL. YES, THE MONSTER HAS ACHIEVED SENTIENCE THIS YEAR AND IS ACTIVELY DESTROYING LIVES. YOUR BEST BET IS TO SPRINT UP THE HILL AND THEN PROCEED TO SPRINT FASTER DOWN THE HILL. DON'T LIKE POTHOLES? TOO BAD BECAUSE YOU'RE GETTING AN EXTRA SERVING, UP- AND DOWNHILL.

QUIT WHINING ABOUT THE HEAT, YOU WHINING WHINER, BECAUSE THE MONSTER TAKES NO PRISONERS. IT'S A GOSH-DANG NAVY SEAL WITH A MISSION, AND THAT MISSION IS TO BREAK YOU LIKE A TWIG.

THINK YOU CAN TAKE THIS HILL? THINK AGAIN, NERD. GEORGE WASHINGTON TOOK TIME OUT OF CREATING THE IDEA OF LIBERTY IN 1776 TO COME TO THE MODERN DAY *JUST* SO HE COULD TRY THE MONSTER. HE WAS QUOTED AT THE FINISH LINE AS SAYING "THAT STUFF BE CRAY-CRAY, YO." YES, THIS CROSS-COUNTRY COURSE PUSHED THE FATHER OF FREEDOM TO THE POINT OF USING TEENAGE SLANG. HARDCORE.

SO DO YOURSELF A FAVOR AND TAKE THE FAMILY ON A MINI-VACATION TO WATCH THE SILVERTON HIGH SCHOOL CROSS-COUNTRY EAM SUFFER AT THE HANDS OF THIS TERROR OF A COURSE. THE SCREAMS OF THOSE WHO FALL PREY TO THE HILL WILL STAY WITH YOUR FOREVER! FOR ONE EASY PAYMENT OF WHATEVER-THE-COST-IS-TO-ENTER-SILVER-FALLS-STATE-PARK, YOU CAN SUPPORT A TEAM AND ENJOY THE OUTDOORS! YOU DON'T GET OUT ENOUGH ANYWAY. ADMIT IT.

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In all seriousness, go watch the Silverton XC team kick some butt tomorrow at the Monster. It's up at Silver Falls State Park and it is gonna be rad. To the runners, go get 'em and have fun! The course will be one you remember forever, and it'll make the rest of the season a breeze. Make me proud!


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These are always fun to write.

-Garrett

Steak and Togas

Damn, those are, like, my two new favorite things.

So, like I said, I'm trying to get into a fraternity. From the numerous meetings and what-not, they have made it very clear to us that the frats at Embry-Riddle are not like the ones from Accepted and Animal House. Which is good. And bad. But mostly good.

There are a few frats on campus, and fewer sororities. But I don't have double-X chromosomes so I'm not too terribly worried about the later.

The two frats I'm looking at are:

Sigma Chi -- the relaxed, fun-loving guys. Sergio is hilarious.

Sigma Alpha Epsilon -- the epitome of class and sophistication (or so we've been told).

Events from the past few days, however, are making me really shoot for SAE. Dec (their recruitment chair) has been extremely friendly towards my roommate Tyler and I. He's invited us to numerous events, like last night's almost-private screening of Animal House, and steak dinner at his house tonight. Yes, togas were/will be worn. More than the events, however, the SAE guys are really swell. Sinjin (because I honestly have no idea how to spell his name) is great, and he works with Cyber Eye which Tyler and I are trying to join.

Oh yeah, Cyber Eye. Basically real-life intelligence gathering and reporting. I actually can't tell you much about it because I don't know that much about it. Only after I sign official nondisclosure documents will they actually give me information. And even then, I can't talk about it with anyone else.

Neat.

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Actually, now it is the next morning. I was going to post this all last night, but I started getting sick so I opted for an early bedtime.

Steak was very nice. It was just Tyler and I at Dec's on-campus house, so we got a lot of one-on-one time with him. Hopefully this is all helping our changes of getting into Sigma Alpha, although I don't mind spending time with Dec at all. He's a bro, bro.

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I keep telling myself I'll stop talking about my boring-ass life and do commentary on something else, but I keep forgetting to be interesting. Maybe next time.

-Garrett

Garrett Goes Greek (Maybe, Potentially, Possibly)

Woohoo, a shiny new blog! This thing looks nice. Preemptive apology: there is nothing interesting here. Go about your day.

First off, my bad for not posting...y'know, last week. The past eight-or-so days have been very busy, I suspect to help with the transition into college life (i.e. not constantly thinking of home). There's a lot of individual stories I could write about the past week, but that involves a lot of remembering and I spent a good chunk of today reading about the principles of cyber security, so remembering kind of sucks right now.

Just got back from dinner, where I sat with a representative from Sigma Alpha Epsilon. His name is Dec, and he's probably the nicest upperclassman I've met thus far. Aeronautical engineer, wants to work SpaceX, likes to snowboard, dresses sharp. What's not to like? And he was very friendly and forthcoming, both we myself and the other dinner patrons.

I was on the fence about "Going Greek" before attending the meeting tonight and enjoying dinner with Dec, but now, I'm excited to try and win a bid. Is it win a bid? Get bid on? I dunno. I wanna join -- there.

SAE said they were all about making men into better men into gentlemen. Now, when I hear "gentleman," I think Zeke Linn. That kid knows style, and he's suave as heck. Bonus points to you, dude. So joining SAE is totally something I can see myself doing and enjoying being a part of. Rush Week is next week, so I guess the process really begins there.

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I came into this week thinking that EGR 115 (Intro to Computing for Engineers) would be my hardest class, as it is reportedly THE most dropped class on campus. Earlier today, I helped a sophomore do our first programming assignment (writing a program to find the surface area and volume of a sphere when the user types in the radius). This is the gist of the code:

% User entry
disp ('The raidus must be 0 < radius < 1.0e100');
radius = input('Enter the radius in meters: ');

% Calculations
volume = (4/3)*pi*radius^3;
surface_area = 4*pi*radius^2; 

% Display results
disp ('The Volume (in meters cubed) is ');
disp (volume);
disp ('The surface area (in meters squared) is ');
disp (surface_area);

To some, that may look complex. But the teacher gave us a finished program that calculated volume, so you really only had to transpose two lines of code and find the formula for surface area to finish it (all in all, adding three lines of code). So I'm thinking this class won't be the hardest as of now. Nah, I think that honor goes to Intro to Cyber Security.

Our first class was Monday. Our second was yesterday. Our third is tomorrow. We were assigned approximately forty pages of reading, due by tomorrow. Welcome to college, I suppose. I'm writing this blog rather than read the last six pages simply because I need a break from that dry book. (On a side note, we finish the book by December. It's pushing 900 pages).

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While I have this moment, I'm gonna apologize for the lack of zest/excitement/actual interesting content in this first post. It's late, I'm rushed, and I don't know quite what to say as of now. I'm thinking of stuff, though.

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To sum up this past week: Nick is so friendly he's going to die, Tyler is really into fraternities, and there are ducks EVERYWHERE in our dorm. Oh, and post-it notes. I still don't get why that is so funny to the other five. Something about bringing girls over, I think...

Assuming I don't post tomorrow, expect highlights from the week, weekend expectations, hopefully some pictures, and other personal junk. I'm tired, I have reading, I don't know what else to say, and I need to go buy a toga.

-Garrett